Sunday, October 24, 2010

She's gone

That's Grandma last month at her 80th birthday party. Not only did she get to see most of her kids, grandkids and great grand kids...she got to see all her surviving brothers and sisters. All the ladies who've come for tea weekly for years were there as well. She had to keep taking naps because being at the table was making her tired.

Isn't she beautiful? Her name is Joyce...perfect name for an angel. She pasted on Oct 20, 2010....that's 10/20/2010. One month after she turned 80. She's with Grandpa now...13 years with out him. She's a very strong lady. 2 month before I was born she had so bury one of her daughters. Jo died in a car accident. She's with her too now.

They're going to sell the house. I know who ever buys it will tear it down...I wish I could buy it. It's the only place I knew I was welcome. A safe haven from the world....there's always food and a warm bed. Now where can I go? I wanted to move back so bad and help take care of Grandma but we couldn't move yet. Sorry Grandma.

Mom just got home and I want to come running to her but I can't. I'm the one who can't be that way. I've missed her so much tho it's not fair. She talked about how stuff was divided and who got what. Between 8 kids, 30 plus grandkids and many great grandkids there was enough to go around. The thought of something going to a thrift store was so depressing....I didn't care if I got it just as long as someone did. But I'd give everything up to see my Grandma again.


Wulf said...

Oh, I'm so sorry! Your Grandma does look happy in that last photo, though, and it's a wonderful way to be able to remember her. She looks so much like my Granny at about that age. Must be the Ukrainian baba gene.

Don't be too appalled by your family. I've noticed that all families go temporarily insane when a loved one dies. They will go back to their normal level of sanity eventually!

While it's sad that the house will be gone, it was your Grandma that made it such a warm, loving place. Without her it's just a house, and maybe it's better to only know it as Grandma's house rather than seeing it being lived in by strangers.

And remember that as a witch,even when your ancestors have passed, they are never lost to you. I'm sure you will find your Grandma will be as great a comfort and help in spirit as she was in life.

Blessed be!

The Blue Faerie said...

My condolences to you, and my smiles to your grandmother. I'm glad she gets to see her family. My grandma died last Sunday & being left behind with the emotional fallback has been tough.

Another blogger recently lost a loved one too. She posted this poem by Mary Elizabeth Frye that has helped me cope. Here's hoping it does with you too.

Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there, I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.